Monday 3 December 2012


I sat in my bedroom the whole of Sunday the 2nd of December feeling very funny and low. After asking myself what the trigger was, I remembered that I always get like that a day to the 3rd of December every year for the past 8 years.

I had the opportunity and rare privilege of being the wife and partner of the most wonderful, loving, industrious, God fearing and kind man. Life could not have been better than that because I was living every woman’s dream.

The best of everything was at my disposal whether I lifted a finger to work or not. We had our ups and downs as usual but making up and resolving our issues, was magical. I was blessed with the best husband and father and his name is JAIYE ABODERIN. He was the love of my life and the one who did everything humanly possible to protect his family. Even in the face of all sorts of problems, all sorts of accusations, all sorts of misconceptions, he was one who understood the true meaning of for better or worse.

Jaiye passed away on the 3rd of December 2004 at a time our dreams and projects were about to kick off. I was 26 with two lovely children and eight thousand naira in my account. Let me not sound like a broken record because I have told this story several times.

The one thing I would like to say is that, his life taught me unconditional love and his death taught me kindness. I am grateful that I had the opportunity to share his air, his thoughts, dreams, hopes, love, friendship and much more.

I have since discovered that if a marriage is not based on trust and friendship but most importantly, the love of God, then I am sorry it will never stand the test of time. I have been there and I know how things can fail right before your eyes without those elements.

So, today I celebrate a man of the people,

 I celebrate a man who stood by his family through thick and thin,

I celebrate a man who touched and saved lives,

 I celebrate a man who was a hero to all who knew him,

 I celebrate a man who was a father to all who knew him,

 I celebrate a man who loved unconditionally,

 I celebrate a man who believed in sharing and caring,

 I celebrate a man who put a smile on people’s faces,

 I celebrate a man who was so full of life,

 I celebrate a man who brought people together and created friendships even in death,

 I celebrate a man who was a bigger star in his own right than most of us,

I celebrate a man who celebrated people without holding back

and I celebrate a man who will always be celebrated.

Rest in peace OBIM, the girls will always remember you and pray for your soul to rest in God’s arms. You will always be in my heart and the love I have for you will never ever die.

It has been eight years but it feels like only yesterday. Instead of crying I choose to celebrate you.

To those of you reading this, remember to give God glory for the life well spent no matter how short. He was a very happy man who hated gloomy faces. As you remember him please wear a smile and pray to God. He will love that very much.

God bless you all, now and always.

A QUOTE I GOT FROM JAIYE: No matter how many times you fall, as long as you are alive, you still have a chance to get up and try again.


  1. wow! Very touching tribute Stella. What can i say? I can't can stop smiling. May you continue to bask in the ambiance of the peace & love you illuminated in this special tribute. God bless!:)

  2. Hmmm...that was the only thing I kept doin while I read this piece. And I must say you have really been strong, thank God for his grace and strength over your life. This loss is something that could have broken you down dramatically but instead you kept on being strong. You shall be there for your children till they grow up to take good care of their mother. You are my role model and God still has plans for you. May his soul rest in peace. He was a good man

  3. May his soul rest in peace,Very touching story but God no the best,live every thing in the hands of God, he will always love u and the kids,His there for u like a angel.ONE LOVE SISTER.

  4. Amazing! That's the only word I can use to describe this tribute Stella. You have continued to rise above all the storms and troubles. As you have held on to God all these years as your source of strength, my prayer is that he will never leave you nor forsake you. I bless God for how greatly Jaiye influenced your life and for the great kids God gave both of you. They will always bring joy to your heart. They are great kids and I can't wait for the world to see what they have turned out to become....angels.
    Stella, keep enjoying your newly found relationship with the Holy Spirit. God bless you.

  5. whao! You are highly favoured, you dont know it yet but please continue to rejoice and again I say rejoice for the lord is on the throne. Rip bro jaiye

  6. Please Stella, permit me to use the quote from Jaye as my status on facebook. It means the world to me and will forever inspire my for life. Am sure he will be smilling to see that his quote continue to inspire not only you but others like me.
    Continue to rest in peace

  7. He will forever rest in peace and for you Stella and the children ,no evil what so ever shall befall you, neither shall any plague come near your dwellings for the Lord will continue to be your light and salvation whom will you fear, he will continue to be the strength of your life of whom shall you be afraid ,even when the enemies will come to eat up your flesh they will continue to stumble and fall in the unprecedented and unbeatable name of Jesus Christ Amen.

  8. Fantastic tribute.May his soul rest in PEACE.

  9. Hmmm...may his gentle soul rest in peace

  10. I'm sure he is looking down on you and smiling, saying "Marrying her was not a mistake".
    Stella, u are a rear gem, a virtues woman and your children must be proud to have u as a mother. I'm so inspired each time i read from u and i'm sure, with u by his side, ur late husband lived his life to d fullest. May his soul continue to rest in d lord and may God continue to lead u on d right track and bless u to inspire others. U are one of my role model!

  11. lovely tribute!

    Even the pictures look like they were taken just yesterday

  12. So touching! may his soul continue to rest in peace..amen

  13. I just read this now, only at d end did i stopped crying, just because u said he hated gloomy faces, may his soul rest in d LORD'S presence & may d LORD strengthen u d more to bring up d kid. AMEN

  14. well written stella, may his loving and happy soul continue to rest in peace. you are truly an inspiring Nigerian actress and i cant tell you how much love and respect i have for you xxx

  15. Wow...this tribute is simply amazing and very inspiring! God bless ur good heart and continually make ur children a great source of Joy 2u. Rest on, Jaiye.

  16. Dear Stella,he watches you and cant help smiling because you turned out exactly how he knew you would.strong,bold,taking life as a challenge and never giving up.Now guess who laughed at death?you! because you definately conquered with the help of wishes

  17. OMG, Stella, you are an amazing & Strong woman with alot of wisdom, God will always be with you, this is so touchy, God bless you always

  18. God will continue to be with you and the children. You have been a strong and industrious woman and I admire you. Keep moving on God has your back.

  19. Stella.............. u are a strong woman, pls continue to stay strong for ur kids............God dey.

  20. You have always been a victor, with amazing strength of mind. May God continue to stand by you. You will continue to triumph over those that condemn you. God bless you.

  21. Inspiring. God knows best. That is a day I won't forget in a hurry. It was a day to my birthday. The Lord that has helped you this far will leave nor forsake you. Love you

  22. Beautiful and inspiring write up,u're the best.God bless u and ur daughters,u're a rare gem.

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