Thursday 27 June 2013

Let's Do This Together

I have often wondered why people especially men have this impression that women don't like each other and definitely do not support each other. I have also seen a lot of strong women who have set up associations, forums, interest groups, clubs and other things just to bring women together. It has been one of the most difficult things to do because as painful as it sounds the men are right. I do not live in self-denial so I am not one of those who will stand and defend a lie.

Most women till date still struggle with envy, jealousy, hatred, gossip, back biting, judging, condemning, destroying, lying and so many other things. As women if WE are honest with ourselves WE will agree in our hearts that WE are guilty of one or more of these crimes/sins. When we think about it we realize that these things never did anything good for us, never made us better people, never made us more intelligent, never made us richer or happier, so the question is WHY?
We see someone who has what we want and instead of working hard to achieve it and asking God to help us, we want to say things to bring them down. Some of us have packed on so many pounds that when we see another woman who is a size 10 our hearts start to race so fast and we just hate them. Some of us want to play that role so bad so the moment another actress is chosen for that role we start to say unthinkable things about them just to hurt their feelings, even when we know it will not change the situation or reduce the amount of money in their bank account.

I was inspired recently by Gabrielle Union who received an Essence award. In her acceptance speech she tells the whole world how horrible she was and how she would do and say anything to bring others down. She was a BAD GIRL who thrived in unforgiveness and envy but after a while she realized she was hurting herself and all the evil did not help her in any way. Today she is free because she has accepted the positive change.
When I heard her speech I was so inspired that I thought to share this with my fellow women because I believe that if we decide to become the sisters we were all created to be, the world would be a better place for us.  Our voices will be heard, our little girls will not be married off at the age of nine, they will get an education, we will have more female presidents, job creation will definitely increase and we can help one another to achieve other things.
I still strongly believe that we all have to keep talking about this, encourage each other to replace hate with love and celebrate ourselves as women. I cannot begin to tell you the benefits that togetherness can bring into our lives.

I am willing to keep talking and keep trying everything I can and that is why I set up the ADIVA mentoring program. This has helped a lot of young girls who have attended our seminars and those who we continued to communicate with. Some people complained that it was not available in their countries, so we decided to have our own website which is under construction now and our blog ( ) which has started. We will have members who can discuss different topics and also network on line. They will also organize their own meet ups in their home country until we can all meet in a country we vote to meet and spend a full weekend there just bonding, sharing, laughing and socializing. This is what it's all about.

A forum created for women and young girls to:

- Share their stories, pain and trials
- Celebrate their achievements
- Talk about family, relationships, work, life other things
- Ask questions and get unbiased, non-judgmental  and professional  answers
- Review books, movies, magazines, articles, destinations, services, products and brands,   arts, music etc.

This is no place for gossip so we will not publish any negative story neither will we publish any unconfirmed information.
Women will experience a sisterhood like never before, friendship that will last, a support system that is strong and a one stop shop for information on the best places to get the best things for the best price at the right time and with good guarantee.
Women can send us an email ( with their businesses that we can review for them and if their products or services are things we can confidently support and vouch for then they get free publicity for a month. This is for products that can be attributed to the body/health, for other things like books, music, events etc. that are positive they get free publicity on all our forms of media.

This is not an association but a movement for women to rise up, come together, empower one another, educate one another and be the best that we can be and also love GOD.
We will not require full names in the forum just first names for privacy.
Some of you might not see the need in doing this but to those of you that do, let's do this together and I know GOD will help us make it a wonderful rewarding experience.
I am excited about this because I get to talk with so many wonderful women from all over the world and you can too. This movement is for all races and no exceptions. All you need to be a part of this is to be a woman or young girl.

However you can take it a step further by becoming a member.
To become a member of ADIVA, send your
NAME, EMAIL ADDRESS, NATIONALITY, COUNTRY OF RESIDENCE and state which of the following age groups you belong to:
(16-20), (21-25), (26-30), (31-35), (36 and Above)
God willing, women will begin to get the protection, respect, recognition and appreciation they deserve.

Welcome to our world, a place where every woman is A DIVA.

By Stella Damasus 

Wednesday 5 June 2013

Just Like Me

I was going through some devotionals as I have been doing everyday for a while now just to boost my faith and give me the strength that I need to go on everyday. As I was getting to the end of my study a message popped up from nowhere. I still don't know where the message came from, who it came from or how it came.
The name of the person that sent it is one I still don't know or can’t figure out till now.
It was a post written by a woman I had never heard of and so out of curiosity I decided to read it. That decision was the best I had taken that day. I felt like the post was written because of me. Yes I can say that about myself since I am not ashamed to say that I sometimes struggle with faith and I’m still searching to know God more.
When I finished reading it I thought about all those people who are just like me and who need to know they are not alone. I had to share this post I received not just to comfort others but to encourage them.
Life is a journey and not a destination so we are all still in the journey. The roads will be bumpy but we just have to keep moving till we get there. Please read the message and be encouraged.

“A perfect faith would lift us up absolutely above fear. It is in the cracks, crannies and guilty faults of our belief, the gaps that are not faith, that the show of apprehension settles and ice of unkindness forms.” -George MacDonald

Do you, like me, have gaps in your faith?

Are there parts of you – tiny little parts – that do not trust God?

I am such a “ponderer,” and it often gets me into trouble. My pondering in congruence with my inquisitive nature leads to an abundance of question asking. More often than not, my questions do not get answered.

Unanswered questions can be unsettling.

I have faith. Some might even say it is strong. I know who God is, and I believe His Word is True. I try my best to trust Him, even when life does not make sense.

However, there are these crevices deep in the recesses of my soul, where fear resides.

I can envision the kind of faith I want to have. I can foreshadow the kind of woman I want to be . . . but I always seem to fall short. I never meet the standard I have engrained in my mind.

I have a very intimate relationship with God now, but it has not always been that way. Life beat me up pretty bad before I was broken enough to recognize my need for Him.

The beating left its mark.

During my high school years, I went through a season of tremendous sorrow. I went to twelve funerals by the time I was seventeen, and most of the deceased were friends my age.

I had so many questions, and no answers.

Questions like:

Why do good people die?
Where was God when my friend’s car was hit by a semi?
Why didn’t God save my friend when she died after three days of being in a coma?
Why doesn’t He stop bad things from happening?
Why didn’t He take away my pain?
Frustrated by the lack of answers, eventually I disowned my faith in God and decided I wanted nothing to do with Him.

I became encompassed in the ways of the world, which eventually made me bitter, broken, depressed, and even suicidal.

Thankfully, after several years of living in darkness, God got a hold of my heart. Life without God in it was worse than having unanswered questions. I chose to release my need to understand. I accepted the fact that God allows things to transpire that I will simply never comprehend on this side of Heaven.

I repented of my sin, and He received me back to Him with arms wide open.

That was seven years ago, and by God’s grace I am not the same person I used to be. However, there are times when I lack the faith to believe that God is going to work everything out for my good, even though He promises to do so. Even though I have seen Him do it time and time again, specifically in using my testimony.

Yes, God redeems, and He heals. I would not be writing this post today if that were not the case. It does not, however, change the fact that experiences have an affect on a person. They shape who we are, and influence the way we think and process things.

Sometimes, the things that have hurt and broken me in the past affect the faith I have in God regarding my future.

I remember the pain of that season as if it were yesterday. There are times when I find myself thinking that maybe God won’t come through, even though deep down I know that is not the Truth.

But He is so faithful. He and I are working through these fears of mine, and we are processing it together.

The pain of that season caused me to demand answers from God. The truth is that He was answering my questions; I just did not like His answers. I still ask Him questions, even now. And His answers are still the same:

My grace is sufficient for you (2 Corinthians 12:9).

The Lord is near the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18).

My ways are higher than your ways (Isaiah 55:8-9).

Even during the times when the pain and sins of my past threaten to derail me, He is steady.

I am learning to let go of yesterday’s pain, so that I can grab hold of today’s joy and tomorrow’s hope.

Maybe life has thrown some things at you that have affected your faith. Maybe you, like me, need the breath of God to blow on the parts of your faith that have been frozen, so that they may be melted down and fresh faith can be reborn.

A prayer:

Lord, I want to have a faith that moves me beyond my fear. Search my heart and soul; reveal to me the parts of my heart that hesitate to trust You. I ask that my faith would be fortified. That Your Spirit would come, and strengthen me by the power of Your Word.