Wednesday, 6 May 2015

The Big Brother Diary Room

 
I don’t watch a lot of reality TV, but the few of them that  I watch are for specific reasons not just because i’m looking for entertainment. 

One that I used to watch in the past but I stopped watching a long time ago is Big Brother. 

I wasn’t watching Big Brother because of its entertainment content, I was watching it because I liked the concept of putting human beings together in a particular place, giving them tasks and seeing it play out. 
However, I realised that in the course of my watching Big Brother, the concept of having the diary room where you can actually go and speak to “someone" who is supposed to be "Big Brother” fascinated me.

In this room you were allowed to pour out your thoughts and say things that you don’t want to say to the other housemates. You could talk about things that are bugging you that you just want to let out, your experiences and even your secrets. 
So the fact that they gave them a room where they could go and express themselves without any disturbance was what fascinated me most and I started to equate the Big Brother Diary Room with all of us as a people, our faith, God and being able to go to a quiet secret place to speak to Him about things that we can’t share with anyone else.

So I started using the same concept of the Big Brother Diary Room for my prayer life even though I knew from time that I was supposed to go into a quiet prayer place. I wanted to actualize it this time and  create a place that I could go to at a specific time everyday and sit down and act as if there was actually somebody there that I was talking to (that person being God), and I would act as if he was sitting in front of me so I can share my thoughts and feelings. 
 Aside having a private place where I could freely communicate with God, it also helped me avoid a lot of trouble and a lot of issues. Sometimes, when you go through things and you feel hurt or when you have secrets, the first thing you want to do is run to someone else, run to one of our friends and share these things with them. But  not everyone can handle the kind of thoughts and secrets we have in our hearts. People have their own private issues and secrets that they are dealing with and then when you add yours, they are now burdened with not only their issues but yours too and this may cause them to unburden it to someone else and innocently your private issues might just start to spread from one person to the other. 
It may not be because the person intentionally wants to harm you but because they also needed to unburden the amount of things that have been poured into him or her. I thought about it and i’ve come to the conclusion that the concept of the Big Brother Diary Room means something different to me. 

When the people in the Big Brother house go to that room and speak they don’t see the person but they speak to them anyway knowing that they will get a response. And I thought to myself, this is a beautiful concept because not only will it get me out of trouble,  it’s also a way of bringing out all the hidden things that i’ve been keeping and suppressing in my heart. So I said why don’t I create a private place, a room that I can go sit, kneel or lie down and just be myself, where I would feel free to talk , scream, cry and say whatever I wanted to say. 
Sometimes I found that silence was another way of letting go in the presence of "Big Brother" who I can’t see but I know is there and in my heart I know that the person is God. I know that when I express myself even without the words, the fact that i’m alone in that room with Him is more than enough for me. 
Not only does it help me in terms of handling my issues and shedding the burden off my heart, it also makes me stronger and more mature so that when things that get me to that point of extreme anger and extreme pain happen, instead of taking it out on people around me or taking it out on anything I see and becoming very grumpy, I just walk to that place I have created as my Big Brother Diary Room.
 
It doesn’t even have to be a room, it can just be any small space in your home, it can even be the bathroom as long as you have a specific place you go to and you can be yourself. No one is looking at you, not your friend, sister, brother, child, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, absolutely no one is looking at you, It’s just between you and God who is being represented as Big Brother in this case. 

It is very important for us that we are able to talk about anything with that friend who will never judge nor condemn nor ask too many questions. It would just be you in that quiet place and He would allow you to express yourself the way you want to. He would allow you to speak, be yourself and express yourself however you want. Its soothing, its quiet, you can clear your head, you can breathe easy and come out of that place a renewed and stronger person. 

It has worked for me each time and I believe it will work for you too.

Stella's Quotes : “Don't forget to pray today because God did not forget to wake you up this morning.” - Oswald Chambers

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